Show Me the Meaning of Being Lonely

Team Biggs' wheels are about to fall off. We went straight from a staggered round of a stomach bug into simultaneous colds of varying intensities. One of the few positive sides to being sick is the family movie cuddle. This morning we watched Disney's new movie Turning Red. The mom in me loved the introduction to big emotions in a comical way. The late 90/2000s teenager in me loved the boy band references (hence the Backstreet Boys' song title). 

One of the other silver linings of sick kids is the time to let my mind wander while snuggling one of their coughing little bodies. This morning I had one of my best ideas of the year. Mariia, one of the teenagers who stayed with us, is a great artist. There is an art school head by a Russian artist down the street from us which offers classes during Easter break. Paul's coworkers generously pooled 1000 Euros for us to support our Ukrainian community. And Boom, more of this is going to be happening in the world.

Sketch by Mariia

The other mom who came to stay with us wrote to me that her pre-teen daughter is having the hardest time - mostly missing her friends. Loneliness is a much harder problem to solve. While this pandemic has been rough (not to mention this war), my hope is that maybe through it all we learn some better coping skills for loneliness. The first of the Sonic series dealt with a very lonely hedgehog, maybe this next long awaited sequel will also provide some good life lessons...

A Proverb for International Women's Day

My goal every day is to have some time to read the Bible. I also try to go to bed before 9:30 everyday. One of those goals happens more than the other. sigh

One of my favorite Proverbs is Proverb 31, often called a virtuous woman. Proverbs 31 is very popular among Jewish and Christian traditions as it describes a "virtuous woman". While my daily life would appear that I support "traditional gender roles",  I am in fact very against putting any person in a box. I am currently reading Nadia Bolz-Weber's book Shameless which has some fresh, albeit at times brash, thoughts on the matter. 

In any case, Carmen is helping me be a Proverbs 31 woman in the sense of:

"She gets up while it is still dark..." vs 15. 

Spring forward will be happening for us in two weeks, I am hoping that will help Carmen adjust to the right time zone. I digress, which how can you not, when this double fisting croissant eater is involved?

Hugo has the right idea here...

And here...

Back to the task at hand, while I prefer an actual physical Bible in my hand, just like any photographer will tell you, the best camera you have is the one on you. So, I read on my phone. I use the Youversion App. Right now I'm doing a Bible reading project with the Portland based group The Bible Project. Most days have a cool animated introduction, which I often watch with the kids, and then associated reading. At my current rate, I think I'll get through this reading plan in five years which isn't bad.

The Youversion App, also has a verse of the day video and children's daily Bible experience. When I don't have a lot of time or when I see the verse of the day has a BIPOC preacher, I try and watch. The verse of the day on international woman's day, was a verse from Proverbs 31. What struck me from the the verse on the 8th of March is:

"She opens her arms to the poor and extends her hands to the needy." Proverbs 31:20

The preacher highlighted the fact that to extend your hands, there is an element of proximity. This concept is especially timely for team Biggs with our proximity to many Ukrainians now living in Berlin. Just last week we saw this message from our babysitter Gen:

I was stoked because I through babushka meant baby, but no, it means grandma. So my amazing girl baby clothes are still on stand-by for another Ukrainian family. But, we were able to meet-up and Carmen now has another little buddy who is just four days older just around the corner from our house. 

Brekkie for the win. Short menu and a crowd pleaser.

This blog post was actually inspired by crowdfarming - the company that sends us our boxes of avocados. They have been partnering with their farmers to send food to Ukraine. If you don't live just around the corner but want to do something to support the people of Ukraine, this is another good option.

Lost in Translation

Feb 17, 2022

Me (through google translate): "Alla, are you sure that it's safe to go back to Ukraine right now?"

Alla: "Ok."

Alla and I weren't the only ones surprised on February 24th when it wasn't ok to be in Ukraine. I have no idea how she returned to Berlin, but on February 27th she was back with two family friends on the way. In the mean time, I casually mentioned Alla and what we should do to two of the coolest people I know:

Gen: Seen here further solidifying Crosby's epic babysitter crush.

Shannon: Seen here saving my sanity...again.

They talked to people and posted an ad on instagram connecting me with some good temporary housing options. These generous people were going to be out of town and were happy to provide their homes.

Alla came over on the first of March to strategize. Alla gave up her room in Berlin to her friend, Lena, who was filling in for while Alla's clients while Alla was planning to be back in Ukraine visiting family for three months. Now, in addition to needing a place to live, Alla also wanted to make sure her friends were taken care of. During the course of the conversation, it was clear to me that coming to our house made the most sense. I figured that heading to our place where we have kids, instead of an empty apartment, would be helpful for moms. Furthermore, I googled and found the average Ukrainian makes around $1,500 a year, so food was going to be crazy expensive. I figured at the very least I could feed them and help them save some money. The next temporary apartment option would be on the 15th of March, so we figured two weeks here would be a good start.

Alla called her friend Olga who said she would be in Berlin that night. With Shannon's help we had this cozy room set-up for five ladies, two moms - Olga and Nata (as the men are not allowed to leave), one 12 year-old Maria, one 11 year-old Katja, and one almost seven year old Kristl:

Carmen still managed to weave around the beds in her usual 'naked from the waist down' look at 5:20 am to surprise Nata. #nottheritz

My first fail was thinking that we could put a sign on Nata's dashboard that said "Ukrainian Refugee" to avoid stoking the around the clock meter. She got a 20 Euro ticket. But, the Berlin city administration issued me a guest parking pass in absolute record time. Shout out to my neighbor Nele who in addition to working, helping me figure out refugee paperwork, making her own art for her apartment, and mothering makes things like this:

Gratuitous food porn: not pictured homemade horn and ears to officially make them unicorn cupcakes. Per usual, food distracts me...

When I came home from test riding a new bike (another distraction), Olga was talking to a woman named Susann on the phone. I have no idea what Susann's connection is to Olga other than she know's Olga's adult daughter who lives in Berlin. Susann offered to help with the paperwork side of things and come over to chat after dinner.

After dinner, Susann arrived as an angel with a freshly made bunt cake. Olga and Nata came down with their one bag that they brought in ready to head out the door. I said, "Wait, are you guys going to stay with Susann?" They said, "No, we found an apartment in Spandau."

Wait, what? You guys stayed one night and you already found an apartment for 2-3 months? When the ladies said they didn't want to bring in their bags because they figured they would be leaving for something more permanent in a day our two I said, "Anything to do with paperwork here always takes longer than you think." I am happy to be proven wrong.

I learned a lot from this furious 27 hours. Firstly, while I want to be a super awesome hostess, it definitely put a strain on my relationship with my kids. I was just so distracted running around, that I wasn't available for them in any way emotionally. Second, even if I was navigating paperwork in my native language, it requires following directions, which we know from my baking isn't my strong suit. Thirdly, while my kids provide great snuggle therapy, they don't create a necessarily restful environment. 

Less than an hour after arrival, Carmen was in cuddle mode.

OK, before you're like, "What have you done with my over confident friend/family member Paige?" This is what I can do: I can write. I can connect people. I can pray. I can encourage people who want to "do something" to donate money to people like my friend Leah who is moving mountains to build infrastructure for Ukrainians to start a new life in Hungary. I can conscript my kids to make art for Alla and Lena.

Plain pots + Acrylic Paints from Papa + Flower = Winning.

My biggest take-home from this humbling and beautiful experience is this: if the men of Ukraine are half as resourceful as the women, this war will go poorly for Putin.